Category — General

I’ve always resisted the temptation to “use the amazing face recognition software and find your celebrity lookalike right now!”

Until today.

Caelyn’s taking a “light” nap, after crying through lunch over Chris having to go back to work, so I’ve had one hand fairly occupied with patting during this afternoon’s blogging/sleeping session. Of course, the best way I could think of to pass the time was to find out if I have a famous face.

It’s not like this line of pondering was completely unprovoked. A couple weeks ago, my friend Cristin was looking through some of my old photos and said I looked like Jennifer Aniston in one. I don’t really see it, but maybe when my face is turned a certain way and the light is just right, I look like her just a bit, because I have had 3 or 4 other people — outright strangers, actually — tell me that I do too. To put the Jen claims to the test, I decided to consult the professionals. (Okay, it’s totally not professional. But it’s kinda fun.)

The results from various different online “face recognition software”?

Not Rachel Green, but Michelle Tanner!

More specifically, the Mary-Kate Olsen half of Michelle Tanner.

These face recognition thingys failed to mention if I look like “young” MK or “now” MK, so I compiled a little MK Photo Timeline.

I’m just gonna skip the Full House era, ’cause you and I both know you know what Michelle Tanner looks like, whether you care to admit it or not. Plus, I’m not a toddler.

Circa Two of a Kind

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Just so you know, I basically wrote an entire post for you on Friday afternoon. But then Caelyn woke up and Chris decided to quit work early, so I put off the last paragraph and revising, and now the whole thing’s obsolete.

Well, not exactly.

It’s about how Chris and I are watching the Indiana Jones movies in preparation for the 4th installment and how I figured we would be watching Temple of Doom that night. I went on to talk about the quality of Temple of Doom versus the other two and about my viewing history with it. I went off on a tangent about my childhood fascination with hidden rooms and the make-believe games I would play as a preschooler at the mall with my mom, then rounded things off with a list of movies I watched a lot prior to 13.

I’m sure you’d just love to have all that info in its full glory right now, but here’s the thing. I wrote that post prior to watching Temple of Doom again and to make it relevant (and accurate) right now, I’d have to add my thoughts during this viewing and edit out speculative statements. . . .

Let me just give it to you straight: I don’t feel like doing the work.

So instead I (swallowed my inclination to feel too materialistic and) scoured the web for pics of all the stuff I bought yesterday on my Day Off Extravaganza.

Oh, you don’t Twitter? So you have no clue what I’m talking about?

Well, for Mother’s Day, Chris gave me “The Day Off.” Since I’m a full-time mom, that means I spent the day away from the apartment without a kid. Cristin watched Caelyn for the entire afternoon and evening on our anniversary last year. But, otherwise, this was my second time to spend more than 3 consecutive hours “alone” in the last 23 months. (Actually, I wasn’t “alone” on our anniversary! But that was a long babysit.) The last time was the day before Mother’s Day last year, when Chris took Caelyn over to his parents’ house for the day and I went to the bookstore, ate a couple good meals, took a bubble bath and a nap, and caught a movie.

This year Chris decided I should expand my wardrobe too. This was a great gift, considering my wardrobe has become very limited. You see, I’ve lost all “the baby weight” and then some, so none of the (few) clothes I’ve purchased since Caelyn was born fit any more. You might be tempted to think all my pre-baby clothes would fit. Not so fast. I’ve got 2 pairs of jeans, a few skirts, and maybe 1 pair of dress pants that fit pretty well. There are more hanging in my closet, but they’re (as much as I don’t understand it) too big.

But the major problem is lack-of-shirts. I don’t have a single pre-Caelyn shirt that fits (other than 2 sweaters, but in case you didn’t know, it’s gonna be mid-90s this week). Explaining why might make us all feel a little awkward, so I’ll just say that you can lose all the weight you want after a baby, but for a few women, some things that get bigger just stay that way. I’m apparently one of those women. So I’ve got 3 t-shirts that Chris bought for me when he was in Austin a couple months ago, a handful of now-baggy (supposed to be fitted) t-shirts that I bought last summer, 1 shirt to go with black pants for every single dress occasion, and 2 “nicer casual” shirts.

I know what you’re thinking: “Well, at least you’ve still got all your shoes.”

Not a chance. I’m also one of those women whose feet got bigger and stayed that way, so 20 to 30 pairs kicked the bucket last summer. (Yeah, I know I had too many to begin with.) My mom’s feet grew a half size with each kid too. But she went from a 5 to a 6 1/2. Have you seen my feet? Seriously. I’m not just self-deprecating for self-deprecation’s sake. All I’m sayin’ is shoe size really might factor in to how many more children we have.

Anyway, I needed some clothes.

And I got some:

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Well, we’ve still got problems (and rain and laziness) over here at the Record. So, as you’ve probably noticed, the posting quantity and quality has significantly declined. To make it up to you, I’ve personally uploaded 15 fun photos just for you!

Okay, so I’m doing a photo post because I’ve got a headache and Wordpress is half of it, and a holiday just passed, so I’ve got a good excuse. I promise I have things to blog about — like my favorite get-ready-for-summer products and last week’s Nyquil-induced dreams — and I will, one of these days.

But, for now, let’s all cozy up on the couch, kill the lights, and get drowsy to the hum of the slide projector.

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Yeah, I know. I’ve been a sorry blogger lately. What can I say? Wordpress is still flippin’. Caelyn and I both have colds. But you haven’t missed much, I promise. To prove it to you and to embody one of the phrases I had to give my high school spanish teacher to get in and out of class (Si la vida te da limones, haz limonada), I offer:

¡LISTAS de MAYO!

10 Events That Occurred in My Life During Our Time Apart, not in any particular order:

1. I saw a baby bird eat a worm.

2. I saw a hawk with a mouse in its claws.

3. I started twittering.

4. I watched “Did I Stutter?” (The Office) on Thursday night and finally felt like the Scrantones put the melody back in my heart.

5. I watched Dan in Real Life and Cloverfield with Chris.

6. I ate Italian Nachos for the first time.

7. I roasted some almonds.

8. I took some Nyquil.

9. I dismantled and cleaned the stove.

10. I laughed out loud when Bert listed “paperclips” first among his favorite things.

10 Things I’ve Thought About Today, not in any particular order:

1. “What if Tom Selleck had been Indiana Jones?” (And, “Will the new Indy movie be good for reasons beyond nostalgia?”)

He just wouldn’t be the same with a stache and a hawaiian button-down.

2. In light of my sister suggesting that my semi-dream/vision of a taco last week might be a sign of pregnancy (I’m pretty sure it’s not): “What did I crave when I was pregnant?”

Answer: chips & salsa, orange juice, pickles & ranch, cranberry apple slushes, Wendy’s bun w/ mayo and tomato.

3. “The informative packet that accompanies women returning home from the hospital after a c-section ought to include instructions on how to do a reverse crunch.”

4. “Do I have enough ingredients to make healthy Mexican food tonight or should we cheat at the beginning of the week instead of the end?” (¡Feliz Cinco de Mayo!) Seriously, if somebody doesn’t give me some queso and a taco soon. . . .

5. “Our apartment grounds really are beautiful.”

6. “How weird is it that when I walked by a couple of movers this morning and smelled stale cigarettes, I immediately thought about being at the hospital?”

7. “I’m not supposed to say, ‘Contrary to what you may think, I’m really not against you,’ until closer to 40.” (I’ll be 37 when Caelyn is 13.)

8. “You might be Doug Heffernan if while exercising you spot a thrown-away pizza box and think about lunch.” (For the record, I had half of a left-over pork chop and broccoli. Chris actually likes broccoli a lot, but lately, I’ve been working veggies that he doesn’t dig into my lunch.)

9. “I’m glad I’ve never written anything bad about Kanye.”

10. “Trev and I ought to meet up at The Tubes some time and let the kids play.” (Caelyn partook of them for the first time this Sunday.)

Oh, yeah, and, “John and Molly are supposed to be having their second baby some time today!” (Why don’t those kids blog any more?)

P.S. In case you didn’t know, your favorite initialed For the Record character and mine turns 28, I think, tomorrow. (Ah, C.C., remember when you came over last time and grilled me about when your birthday was, expecting me to fail miserably? What were you thinkin’? I even remember that we watched Spaceballs at your joint party with Jeremy at his grandparents’ house. Do you remember the time we ate snowcones on mine? Yeah, I know you don’t read my blog.)

“Move over Miley Cyrus”
Originally uploaded by baileypiracy.

Okay, so when are we gonna start making cash off our kids, JSmo? I can’t believe this pic! Have you secretly been training her to model?

(As always, great set, JB.)

P.S. Sorry for all the posting and deleting and crumby layout. Wordpress and I are still temporary mortal enemies. I’m sure we’ll be BFF again soon.